The Guy on the Right Page 13

  Forty-five minutes later…

  “Devin. Devin? Devin! Can you hear me? I feel like I’ve been in this bathroom for hours.”

  “Yes, yes, I can hear you, stop yelling, moron. What’s up?”

  I press my cell closer to my ear and whisper. “What in the hell did Fraz put in this gummy?”

  “Oh my God, you took it?”

  “No, I just called to tell you I didn’t. Things are totally normal, and I haven’t locked myself in the bathroom at school. This is what high feels like?”

  “I wouldn’t know, I’m not high. Why did you have to do this on inventory day? I can’t even come watch you freak out.”

  “I got off my shift and came to school to grab Theo like I promised. But once I started walking down the hall, my legs turned into noodles, and I felt like I got shot in the neck with a tranquilizer dart. Everything is getting…slower. I’ve been sitting on this toilet hiding ever since, and I swear this song has been playing forever.”

  “Girl, don’t drive.”

  “I can’t even walk.”

  “How much did you take?”

  “Half that disc.”

  “You were only supposed to take an EIGHTH! Those edibles are strong!”

  “Oh no,” I lift my hands up in front of me. “I think my hand’s webbing. Is this normal? I hope Theo is okay.”

  “He took it too?!”

  “Yes.”

  “All those times I asked you to get high with me and you wouldn’t but for him, you will? And Theo doesn’t seem the type to do something like this. What were you thinking?”

  “Stop making me out to be the culprit.”

  “Aren’t you?”

  “Yes. But for good reason. I had to pull out the big guns. Emergency high. His roommate screwed his ex last night. Wretched bitch. I just didn’t want him thinking about her all day. He was so sad.”

  “You sound jealous.”

  “I’m pissed for him. I care about him a lot.”

  “Uh huh.”

  “I swear to God if you start singing Christmas Carols right now.”

  “I won’t.”

  “Good, can you please tell me how to get out of the bathroom?”

  “Jesus. Maybe Dad could cover for me so I can rescue you two.”

  “I’ve got this. We’ll Uber it home.”

  “Swear to the Lort?”

  “Aww, you Madea’d me. You must really love me.”

  “Of course I love you, you idiot. You need to leave school now. Get Theo and get the hell out of there before it hits harder.”

  “On it. Wait, it’s going to hit harder?”

  “I don’t know, just go get him.”

  “Just have to figure out who makes this toilet. It feels like Jell-O on my ass.”

  “Seriously?”

  “It’s comfortable.”

  “Laney, go get him. If he’s in as bad of shape as you, this could be disastrous.”

  “Oh,” I snort, yanking at the toilet paper. “That’s right. He’s got a rep as a Grand Band Man.”

  “And he’s on scholarship, remember? I’m pretty sure getting stoned at school is frowned upon.”

  That sobers me. “I gotta save him!”

  “You think?”

  “I think this song’s on repeat.”

  “It’s been like fifteen seconds.”

  “I don’t believe you,” I mutter as I glance around the bathroom stall. “You have got to try out this toilet.”

  “Laney, FOCUS! Get Theo and get out of there!”

  “Right. I’m on it. Devin?”

  “Yes, girl?”

  “Why don’t we eat more Jell-O together?”

  Theo

  My legs won’t move no matter how much I will them to. I feel like I’ve been sitting here for years.

  Everything is vibrating.

  I’m going to die.

  Pulling out my phone, I text Laney.

  Theo: I nees to leave. I don’t tink tis is mellow.hi. Can come now?

  Laney: I’m working on the Jell-O.

  Theo: ?

  Laney: How long is this song!

  Theo: IDknow. I cat ducking feel my fat.

  Theo: Fet

  Theo: Fet!

  Laney: I coming to slave you.

  “Hey man,” someone says to my left, and I jump back in my seat and clutch my phone to my chest.

  “What do you want?” I grunt, lifting a shoulder and lean away from him.

  Three rows of students turn back to look at me as the guy widens his eyes. “Wasn’t talking to you, bro, chill out.”

  I concentrate on opening my eyes as wide as his to appear more normal and hear a giggle from beside me.

  “Hey, are you okay?”

  “I have something in my feet.”

  “Oh shit, he’s probably on Molly,” the girl whispers. She’s not pretty like Laney.

  “I’m not,” I whisper. “Not on that.”

  “He’s trippin’.”

  “Please don’t say that to people,” I whimper. Just then, the door to the classroom bursts open, and everyone, including my instructor, looks toward the open door at Laney as she lands a plane. She’s looking right at me mouthing in slow motion, and I lean into my desk straining to hear her.

  “Dude, I think she’s here for you.”

  Laney speaks up, taking a few steps into class. “Excuse me, sir, I need an urgent word with one of your t-t-udents, students.”

  “You’re interrupting my lecture, young lady.”

  She nods in perfect understanding. “I polizise. He’s having an allergic reaction to his medication and needs this,” She pulls out an EpiPen. She probably bought it in case I have a reaction around her because she’s my best friend in the whole world. And I don’t want to have sex with her all the time.

  “Go right on ahead.”

  Laney waves me down to her.

  “Medication, my ass,” someone snorts from below.

  “Oh man,” the guy next to me says. “I would give my left nut to be on your level right now. And with her too, damn.”

  I shake my head. “That’s not what’s happening. I’m not going to let my feet not move.”

  “Okay,” he says with a chuckle as Laney looks at me and waves her hands slowly.

  She’s so beautiful it makes my chest hurt. I rub it with my fist and hold it up to her so she can see before pulling myself to stand. Uneasy on my feet, I slowly make my way down the steps thanking each one in sincere gratitude. “I appreciate you.” Laughter erupts to my right just as Laney grabs my arm when I reach the last one.

  “He probably won’t be back,” Laney says. “Sorry about that.”

  Outside the class, she grabs my face with both hands and pulls me down eye level with her. Honey eyes bore into mine while her lips shine like diamonds.

  “I may never return to them,” I tell her feeling a lump form in my throat.

  “Return to what?”

  “My feet.”

  “Hang in there, okay?”

  “I love your hands on my face.”

  “Listen to me, Houseman. We ate too much. We are Snoop Dogg at the Chronic Olympics high. We have an Uber coming in five minutes. I need you to find your feet.”

  “I dunno that’s plauisbble.”

  “Dave in the white Taurus, do you believe in Doritos?” Laney asks from beside me in the back seat as I study the lines dancing on my jeans.

  “I believe in Doritos,” I tell her.

  She grabs my hand. “I know you believe. I want to know if Dave believes.”

  “Why? He’s not your boyfriend.”

  “He’s a person.”

  “He looks like Carrot Top without hair.”

  “That’s not nice, Houseman. Dave, I think we should stop for tacos.”

  “We do not need tacos. I need feet.”

  “Jesus, are you two drunk? It’s 10:30 a.m.”

  “We’re doing weed,” Laney snorts softly before her lips quiver. “Forgive us.”
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  Dave smiles at her in the rearview, and I want to tell him not to smile at her like that, but my tongue is swelling. “Imma need that apic pen.”

  “You don’t need it. I promise.”

  “I’m thinking you two don’t do much weed.”

  “First timers!” Laney proclaims. “Does this window go down?”

  “Sure,” Dave says. “Do you mind changing your destination for tacos?”

  “No,” I say, shaking my head. “No tacos. Everyone knows what’s happening to us.”

  “What’s happening to us?” Laney asks, pushing the button over and over. I stop her hand before I run my fingers through her hair.

  She moans. “That feels so good.”

  “Thank you. I want to do it sometimes a lot.”

  “You can do it all the time,” Laney says, leaning down to put her head in my lap.

  “You’re going to make me cry,” I rub my chest.

  She puts a hand on my face from below, looking up at me with earnest eyes. “Don’t cry, Theo.”

  “I hate to break this up, you two, but we’re still here.”

  “Sorry?”

  “We arrived five minutes ago.”

  Laney slowly raises to sit and looks out the window. “Look alive, Houseman. We made it.”

  “My eyes feel so slippery.” I blink them over and over.

  “Come on,” Laney says, pulling at my arm. “We have to get out.”

  Dave opens the door, and I wince from the sun reflecting off his head. “Do you two need help inside?”

  “I just need to feel,” I admit, emotion clogging my throat.

  “It’s going to be okay, man,” Dave says.

  He’s so close when he speaks, I jerk away from him.

  Laney grabs my hand, pulling me from the car. “I’ve got you, Theo. Bye, Dave.”

  “You two be careful.”

  “We’re positive,” Laney tells him, throwing my arm over her shoulder.

  “You think he knows I can’t feel my feet?”

  “He’s aware. You stay put.” She says, depositing me on her porch. “I think I have some eggrolls.”

  “Oh, I want them so bad. Will you bring them to me?”

  “For you, I will.”

  “Thanks, Laney.”

  Theo

  The sun wakes me peeking through a cloud under the overcast sky. I rouse with a wad of hair in my mouth, covered in a sleeping Laney. The warmth streams through the teepee window at the top of our fortress. Fuzzy memories come back to me in waves. Laney had pulled out half of her gear from the shed next to her house insisting we camp out, so we didn’t disturb her sleeping mother who had a shift in a matter of hours. Stoned out of our minds, it took us a small eternity to pitch the tattered tent amongst the thick of the trees in her front yard. Safe in our cocoon, we unleashed laughter that lasted for hours. And I’m positive she made the pizza delivery guy shit his pants when she jumped out into the drive waving her hands like a lunatic to intercept the delivery from reaching the front door. I can’t help my chuckle when I remember the look on his face.

  My stomach is sore from all the laughing we did.

  What started out as the worst morning imaginable, easily turned into one of the best days of my life. Because of her.

  She shifts, her thick locks tickling my nose as she slumbers sprawled on my chest. The air inside the tent warms as she burrows further into me, gripping my bicep and holding me to her with a thigh stretched across my stomach. I need to take a leak, but I fight like hell not to disturb the peace. Instead, I stare down at her, memorizing what I can—flawless brown skin, a freckled nose, dark lashes, and full, bee-stung lips.

  I’ll never fucking learn.

  Even with the red flag of Nora tossed in my face only this morning, I can’t stop imagining what it would be like to truly be with Laney.

  My attachment is much too evident at this point as I study her, and that’s all I seem to be doing lately when I’m not thinking about her. I don’t want to contemplate our differences. Not with the way she fits so perfectly on top of me. No matter how hard I’ve tried to stop it, I’ve fallen under her spell. She makes me want, and often.

  She’s entirely too much woman to ignore.

  Pressing a kiss to the top of her head, I inhale her signature scent of mint and citrus. I love the smell and allow myself to indulge while I have this chance. Holding her to me, I slide my thumbs against her skin in a caress. We’re both fully dressed, but with my thoughts, I feel exposed, despite still being in our cocoon.

  I’m completely myself with her, and she with me. I know this. I don’t question our connection or the authenticity of our friendship. It’s not chemistry we lack, it’s the readiness on her part that I need to feel. And after that exchange in the coffee shop, everything shifted, at least for me.

  I no longer want to be adorable to Laney.

  The clarity has my heart aching and my eyes wide open.

  I can no longer be Laney’s friend.

  My dick is rock hard by the time she moves, her soft groan only fueling my desire.

  Sleeping bags lay piled beneath us in our makeshift fortress. I’m more comfortable than I’ve ever been in my life, even with a raging hard-on. I’m positive we fell asleep mid-sentence with smiles on our faces.

  Laney stirs, and I brush the hair away from her face while she lifts her chin, bringing light brown eyes to mine.

  “Hey.”

  “Hey.”

  We’re close, so close I can see the faint green circle around her irises and the flecks of amber gold within. She studies me just as carefully, and I relax in the feel of her resting so contently on top of me.

  “I feel like a lazy cat.”

  “Don’t move,” I mumble, running my fingers through her hair.

  “Feels so good,” My dick jerks at the sound of her raspy voice and my pulse picks up. “Are you cold?”

  “No,” there’s clear heat to my voice that I try to disguise as sleep. “I’m good.”

  Her eyes pool before she averts them, her lashes flitting over her cheeks as she surveys my chest. She’s turned on too. I can hear it in her voice. It’s then I feel it, from her. “Epic nap.”

  “Best sleep I’ve had in a long time.”

  We share a shy smile as she palms my chest, covering my heart.

  “You feelin’ okay, right here?”

  “Perfect.”

  “Really?”

  “Yeah, haven’t thought about it at all since the coffee shop.”

  Her eyes light, and it’s then, I know. “Good.”

  Just as I’m about to grip her face, she giggles into my neck. “We took like four times the amount we were supposed to. My bad.”

  “Another whoops?”

  “Yeah,” she laughs. “Sorry, but it wasn’t so awful, was it?”

  “No,” I thread my fingers through the silky strands at her back. “It never is with you.” I gently nudge her. “Hey, when did you buy an EpiPen?”

  Smiling, she pulls away from me to sit and starts sifting through her purse, producing a slender white container. “It’s not an EpiPen. It’s one of those discreet tampon holder thingamajiggies. Looks like an EpiPen, doesn’t it?”

  I grin. “Clever.”

  Fearful eyes search mine. “I’m really sorry. You could have gotten into big trouble.”

  “A reaction to meds was the perfect excuse. Only you would use enough ingenuity to come to my rescue and save me with a tampon.”

  “Tampon holder. And that’s true. I am a genius.”

  I roll my eyes. “I wouldn’t go that far.”

  Her blinding smile has the ache returning in my chest. “Well, today was the best day, ever.”

  “I agree.”

  I sit up, pulling my vest down to try and cover the bulge in my pants. “Thanks for saving me, again.”

  “Anytime,” she says, glancing over her shoulder to look back at me. “I mean that.”

  It takes every amount of reserve st
rength I have not to pull her to me and kiss her. Instead, she lifts her phone to show me our latest post, and I crack up at the picture and the hashtags.

  “It’s the perfect picture to describe today.”

  I look over to see her staring at me. “Yeah. It is.”

  #outlaws #gummietuesday #nexttimefollowdirections #campinginthefrontyard #bestdayever #whoops #whoneedsfeet #thefaceoftwopeoplewhoshouldvebeenarrested #uberdaveisasaint #believeindoritos #bestfriendssolidified #livingourrealestlife

  Theo

  “Where are you going all dressed up?” Troy asks as I pull on my jacket.

  “Rehearsal dinner,” I mutter. I’ve been avoiding him all week, and he’s let me. He tried to come down to the basement to talk, but I’d shut him out.

  I can be a dick when I want to be.

  Troy sits on the couch tossing a football up as I do a last-minute perusal.

  “Who’s getting married?”

  “A friend of a friend. What’s it to you?”

  A loud, exasperated groan leaves him, and I turn in his direction.

  “Jesus. How many times do I have to say I’m sorry?”

  “You don’t. I’m over it.” And it surprises me how much I mean it.

  “You serious?”

  “I mean I don’t want to hug it out with you, but yeah, I’m completely over her. I’ve got something much better going on.”

  “That so?”

  “It’s so. Just do me a favor and start vetting before you bring anyone else here. Not that I have any more exes. But let me make one thing clear, I don’t want yours, and I don’t want you ever taking a second look at mine.”

  “Got it. I’m not going to…see her again.” It’s all I can do not to roll my eyes. He stands and pulls out a few bills from his wallet. “For what I owe you.”

  I take the money as a sign of good faith and spot the duffle packed at his feet. “Where are you going?”

  He shrugs. “A few guys are headed to Shreveport this weekend. I’m going to check it out. Lance left a note on the fridge that he’s out until Tuesday, so the house is all yours.”

  “Nice.”

  A horn sounds outside, and Troy pulls his duffle from the floor. “Later.”

  “Later, man.”

  He pauses at the front door. “We good?”